One day, three women of varying ages, body shapes, and breast naturalness took the stage to moan out pretend orgasms while the rest of us cheered for our favorite faker. They all have furnished balconies or patios with either ocean or garden views, and spacious bathrooms with walk-in showers and Molton Brown toiletries. One woman was getting railed from behind. I had a feeling that cocktail was going to get me pissed enough to at least take my top off. Rather than stroke his dick up and down in the classic style, the woman was beating her palm across the head of his penis—rubbing it back and forth—like someone slapping the control ball on the vintage golf arcade game Golden Tee.
If you've got sex or relationship questions, clothing-optional resorts are a great place to ask them, because people will not hold back with their answers. There are activities by the pool during the day, but at night the action moves to Melange Bar -- located outside the lobby -- and later to the nightclub and its adjacent Sin Room equipped with round beds and straps for those who want to take part in sexual games with other guests or with their partners. It's great and it's comfortable…but it's also kind of boring. He was chilling—half submerged and totally nude—on the Jacuzzi's steps. According to Daniel, one of two Americans who work at Desire Pearl selling vacation packages, the obfuscation allows for a level of discretion, even deniability. For the first time all week, Laura decided to ditch her bikini bottom and climb into the hot tub fully naked. For many visitors, secrecy is serious business.
But they had one last arrow in their quiver. I got up, untied my top as I walked through the valley of sunbathing penises, tossed it onto a chaise lounge, and made my way into the water. It took a few days, but I noticed something odd about the nocturnal rhythms of the resort. Our friends, who laughed good-naturedly and incredulously asked how we didn't know what the deal was all along, joined us on the dance floor. A bellhop ferried my bags toward my room, past pungent trees heavy with tropical fruit.
He had the vibe of the world's most amiable polar bear. I veered down a narrow path, following the sounds, and slid around a high wall, emerging beside the mammoth Jacuzzi on the edge of Desire's campus. It was their second day here, and they seemed perhaps even more weirded out by the scene than I was. The impressive reefs just offshore attract a fair share of divers, and many come to take a dip in the inland cenotes massive sinkholes filled with crystal clear groundwater. We once had a dive with only us as divers. I was getting and craving more freedom. Lose yourself in the sensuality of a couples-only ambience, full of respect and intimacy, vibrating in pleasure without limits, where clothing is optional.
There's nothing wrong with that. You are just one click away! And she quickly sniffed me out as a newbie, scared to take off my clothes. Perhaps the weirdest thing about the whole scene was how few guests took notice of such a spectacle. Back home, they would've had me arrested. After two weeks, it becomes totally normal. The sight of it all burned my retinas. They figured Desire Pearl, a resort far from home and stocked with other frisky couples, might be a fine, low-risk place to indulge some of that curiosity.
At that exact moment, I finally understood the appeal of nude beaches. And that means you can make it a tame-ish good time, or you can get a little more risque. On the beach below, a spider monkey rested his chin in his hands, as though smitten with the scenery himself. Everyone was drunkenly chatting, laughing, flirting, and making out. This was particularly true of the water sports equipment.
One couple we met said they did it six times in a day. These are doctors, dentists, and systems engineers. They don't call it Desire for nothing. Through the gauzy fabric, I could see two bodies in motion, gently writhing. From our experience, make sure your relationship is rock solid and built on trust and love with no hidden agenda. The guests were ridiculously friendly.
One disappointment was the inability to swim off the beach. With as many as 10 million to 15 million Americans identifying as swingers, it just makes sense that a niche service within the travel industry would rise up to snatch their vacation dollars. Turns out, there are a few and they're laid down in a booklet distributed at check-in. The rest of the day flew by in a blur of sun, sand, and nudity, and after taking a post-dinner power nap, I was ready to see what the nightlife had to offer. I was livin' my vida loca.
It wasn't about being sexy; it was about nobody caring who's sexy or not. I stopped feeling the excitement I used to feel around him. I have never seen a group of middle-aged people this excited before. Another told us how they've kept their sex life exciting after decades together. While the men seem to handle any initial negotiations, according to the people I talked to, it's the women who ultimately call most of the shots.